World Kindness Day and Ways to be Kind
文/荟同学校 社交情感教育老师 金航 By Huitong School SEL teacher Ms. Jin
World Kindness Day is on November 13, marked across the globe to promote the importance of being kind to each other, to yourself, and to the world. It is observed to make the world a better place by celebrating and promoting good deeds among people. Apart from spreading kindness, the day further aims to highlight the good deeds in the community. These good deeds help in bridging the gap between religion, gender, and race. Kindness is also our SEL curriculum's topic in November, which aims to encourage everyone's kindness on campus.
友善是一种双赢的局面，尤其是在艰难困苦的岁月里。微小的努力可以对人们的生活产生重大影响。 我们有多种方式可以表达善意并激励他人也这样做。 如果一个人每天都做善事，世界就会变得更美好。
Being kind is a win-win situation, especially during a hard time. Small efforts can make a big difference in people’s lives. There are various ways in which one can project kindness as well as inspire others to do the same. If one follows a kind act every day, the world will be a better place to live.
Here are some coping strategies that you might find useful to share with your children to help them being kind to themselves and others.
你能做什么？What can you do?
技巧1：发现和鼓励孩子的善举能帮助您的孩子培养友善的自我认同感。例如，当您观察到孩子在帮助别人或者做一件友善的事情，您可以告诉孩子：“我看到你在帮助你哥哥，你真是个善良的孩子。” 帮助您的孩子意识到 “我是一个善良的人”的内在身份，对于“巩固”孩子的善良有很大帮助，并使其成为一种持久的品质。
Tip 1: Help your kids develop a caring identity and see the good in your kids. For example, "I saw you help your brother, you are such a kind person." Helping your child develop and embody an identity that includes "I am a person who is kind" goes a long way in 'solidifying' kindness in your child so that it becomes a lasting trait.
技巧2：给予孩子展示友善的机会，并与孩子聊聊友善带来的美好感受。鼓励孩子日行一善，并反思友善给他们带来的感受。比如，您可以在家里粘贴友善日历，鼓励孩子按照日历日行一善，并分享行善后的感受。在学校里，有的班级里有“善意桶”。孩子们经常画善意纸条行善举，比如“今天做 5 件不同的善事”、“对某人说些友好的话”和“邀请一个你不经常一起玩的学生在课间休息时与你一起玩。” 我们鼓励家长通过询问孩子的这些学校活动，来帮助孩子们思考行善的感受。
Tip 2: Foster opportunities to be kind and talk about the good feelings that come from being kind. Encourage your kids to engage in opportunities to practice kindness, and to reflect on how being kind made them feel. As an example of this, you can stick a Kindness Calendar at home to encourage your children to do a kind thins every day on the calendar and share their feelings. We have Kindness Buckets in some classroom this year, as part of our Year of Kindness initiative. Kids are regularly drawing kindness slips to act upon that say things like “Do 5 different kind things today,” “Say something nice to someone” and “Invite a student you don’t usually play with to join you at recess.” Parents are being encouraged to help their kids reflect on being kind by asking them about these school activities and how being kind made them feel.
技巧3：最大限度地支持孩子并尽量减少惩罚。您的孩子可能不会每时每刻都很友善。当“非友善的事情发生”时，试着采取一种富有同情心、支持性的方式，而不是惩罚性的方式对待孩子。例如，“哇，你做这件事情，一定是有什么原因。这是怎么回事？” （支持性方法）而不是说 “去你的房间面壁思过！” （惩罚性的）。
Tip 3: Maximize support & minimize punishment. Your kids may not be kind every moment of every day. When “stuff happens,” try adopting a compassionate, supportive approach rather than a punitive one. e.g., “Wow, for you to do this, there must really be something going on. What’s up?” (supportive approach), vs. “To your room!” (punitive).
Tip 4: Model Kindness and Caring. Children learn more from our actions than our words. Modelling compassion and forgiveness yourself will go a very long way in teaching your children to be kind.
Tip 5: Be Kind to Yourself. We have all experienced how, when we are feeling stressed, at the end of our rope or unhappy – not to mention angry or wronged in some way – it can be difficult to feel open-hearted and kind towards others. Kindness and emotional health are wrapped up together; growing one grows the other. Therefore, if we prioritize being gentle with and kind to ourselves, kindness to others will flow naturally.
Wishing you all love and kindness in November!
Dr. Kimberly Schonert-Reichl, Dr. Felix Warneken and other researchers in the field of positive psychology.
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